I don't deserve anything that I've not fought for!!!!

I don't deserve it because i am not fighting for it.....

They say.....

fight for something you believe in

fight for something worth fighting for

fight for something you love

fight for someone you love

I'm confused.... have I been fighting for the past?

Have i been fighting for anything?!!

I have not.... 

Attitude of 'Tidak Apa' seems seeded inside me since I was very young. It grows, growing and keep growing because i let it grow freely and it rooted unnoticed.....

Maybe I'm lack of apathy.

Maybe desire army is not strong enough to fight evil attitude of 'Tidak Apa'.

Maybe I have a stupid perception of I'm not going to die even if I don't fight for it.

Maybe the fear of rejections and defeats caused by past experiences.

But today, I'm awake.... it's the denial of the fact that I'm still happy and comfortable without fighting for what it seems to be unimportant. I've used to it. Unconsciously denying the fact for a very long time and it's get comfortable.

I don't deserve anything that I've not fought for!!!!

Now, I have awake. I have to start fighting.

Fight for things that I've lost for not fighting.

Fight for things I believe in

Fight for things I want and love

Fight for someone worth fighting for...............